So I just returned from my Art Conference which is where this blog originated. Last year at this time, I was inspired to get in touch with my creative side. I decided that when the new year arrived I would start this blog and start focusing on me. So 'Moving Me' started. I feel like I have not met my own expectations in actually moving me towards anything. I really have not accomplished most of the things I wanted to do. I have done a few things, but trying to get back to my creative self has not really been my focus. I will be taking a painting class November 16th. I am looking forward to this class. I have always wanted to improve my painting skills.
Over this last year I have learned a few things about myself and others. I have come to realize that I am the happiest when I am making other people happy. I absolutely love to cook. When I have free time for myself, I either waste it away or end up doing something for someone else. I enjoying watching TV and staying home. I love to have friends and family over. I don't like fake friends. I don't like liars. I don't like Lilly living so far away. One of the most important realizations that I have had is about Lilly.
I know I always talk about her in almost every blog I have done, but she is always on my mind. She is so very special. She has stolen my heart and has such a strong grip on it that it takes my breath away. When I had Brittany and Jonathan, they were my entire world. When I had Brittany I was certain that I would never be able to love another child like I loved her. There was no way, she was too special. Then along came Jonathan and he had my heart from the second I laid eyes on him. I found that there was room for both my babies in my heart. I didn't ever think I could love anyone as much as those two...until Lilly came along. Everyday I see her grow and change. I feel so proud of Brittany. She is such a wonderful mother to Lilly. I couldn't do it any better ( except keeping socks on her cold feet, lol). I am very passionate about the care Lilly receives. It infuriates me to have these "professionals" act like it is acceptable for Lilly to be behind or slower in her accomplishments because she is blind. If I hear one more person tell me this I might have to punch them in the face!! My next step is to hire an advocate/lawyer to help these people understand that their lack of seriousness in educating Lilly is unacceptable and will be changed. Enough said!
I have realized over the last year that I am thankful for my family. My sister moved from Atlanta to be closer to my parents. I love that she is so close. I have missed hanging out with her over the past years. I am thankful I still have my parents and have realized I need to spend as much time with them as I can. I love that I am close with my brother. We missed out on a lot of time when we were young, but I feel like we have made up for that and we are stronger than ever. I miss going out with Jim. We used to go out every Friday night to play poker and I miss that. I miss all the kids being at my house at any given time. My niece used to be over with her kids everyday and it's hard not to see them all the time. I hate that Lilly doesn't live with me anymore. I have had her since she was born and it's very hard to be without her.
There are still a few things that I would like to do before this year is over. I am not sure if I can get them done. I think I want to try to do this blogging thing again next year and really do it they way I had it in my mind at first. I really do want to get back to my artistic side and that may have to include a cooking class or two.
Good Night,
KK
