Best Weekend Ever!!

This weekend was absolutely by far the best weekend I have had in a long time. It started off great and only got better. Friday night, Sue and I had a wonderful dinner and relaxed and caught up on our shows. It was very nice to sit back, relax, and enjoy our quiet time. Saturday, my mom and daddy came to visit me. My daddy made me a beautiful headboard for my bed. We went shopping and out to lunch. After our shopping we came home to install the headboard. They only stayed for a few hours and then they went home. My niece Melissa came to visit later on Saturday. Her and Destiny got there about 6:30. We went to pick up Sue and headed for the movies!! I love going to the movies. We went to see Oz, the Great and Powerful. We decided we could have waited for it to come out on DVD, but it was good. Sunday came and I actually slept in for the first time in a long time. I started the day by face-timing Brittany and Lilly. She was in Loudon visiting Sean and they were going to meet me for lunch so I could see her and Lilly. We met at Noodles & Co., Brittany favorite place. I fed Lilly and played with her for an hour. Then I talked Brittany into letting me have her for the rest of the day. What a JOY!! We had the best afternoon EVER! I got her all to myself, no sharing, no interruptions!! It was so nice to hold her and talk to her and play with her. She finally settled down in my arms and fell asleep. I sat in the chair for almost two hours just holding her and staring at her beautiful face. She is the sweetest thing on this Earth! She is so gentle especially when she takes her tiny fingers to feel your face. She starts at my chin and slowly works her way up to my glasses and promptly takes them off. She doesn't want them on. Then she continues to up to my hair. Once she has searched my entire face she presses her little palm gentle on my cheek, and then puts her tiny little head on my chest. Its almost like she is saying ahhhh that's my MiMi, I love you. She is just so sweet. She is an angel sent straight from God. She has changed our lives in so many ways. I had to take Lilly back to meet B a little bit ago and it was so sad. I miss her already.

I have a lot more to talk about but I am falling asleep. I'll have to pick up again another night. Going to bed early to end a PERFECT weekend!!

Good Night all,
KK

Snow Day

I finally got my snow day! I had such high hopes of all the things I want to accomplish on my snow day. I had plans to work on my computer class, grad work, cleaning my room, baking, and catching up on sleep. Well I'm sorry to report I did nothing. First of all, I woke up at 4:00 am. I have no reason why this happened but I could not go back to sleep. So I watched news about the storm for three hours!! Finally fell asleep at about 7:00. I did make a nice homemade breakfast for Jonathan and me. We watched a movie together and I made us lunch. I stayed in my pj's all day! It was lovely, relaxing, and refreshing. My best girlfriend texted me and twisted my arm to go out with her tonight. And, I did. We had a great time playing poker, then she talked me into a Beer Pong tournament!! No Beer involved just pong. It was a blast. We need a lot of practice, but for first time players we held our own! I miss you K-squared. Come to find out even though I got nothing done today, I get another shot at it tomorrow!! Another snow day. How lucky am I?

All the family is coming home this weekend, so I will have a house full. I'm excited. I get to cook and see everyone. We are all going to VA Beach for the day to look at a wedding venue. We found a superb deal and need to check it out.

I looked back at my list of things I wanted to do and realized I haven't done any of them. I need to get working on them right away. I really want to go to New York City. I'm not going alone so Danielle, Hani..who's in? I am going to Atlantic City for two nights over Spring Break. We are staying in the Chairman Tower at the Taj...so nice. A room with a view. I will be playing poker and relaxing in the indoor pool. I might even visit the Coach outlet store, who knows.

Going to AC also brings with it a butt load of guilt. I find myself riddled with guilt. Guilt for not going home to see my parents and guilt for not visiting Jim my entire break. I will see him for four days of my break. I know I will no have my parents forever, but I won't be seeing them over break. I am stressing about going but feel I need to do something that I want to do. Then I feel guilty that I'm not wanting to go visit family. It's just a vicious circle. It has been months since I have done something just for myself, so I hope everyone understands. I have to pray for some peace about this and other things too. I find myself constantly worrying about Brittany and Lilly and I just can not find the peace. I have prayed about it but the peace is not coming. Something is keeping me worried. I'll just keep praying.

Look at that face! God love her!!

Bonne nuit,
KK

Lilly Ryan Beckett

I know I write about Lilly all the time. She is always on my mind. She is so precious and I miss her so much. I feel like I am missing out on so many things. I know that most grandparents feel this way and usually do 'miss out' on events in their grandchildren's lives. However, Lilly has been with me since birth. I helped to bring her into this world. I was there helping to clean her off moments after she arrived. I was there when she was sick and no one knew what was wrong with her. I was also there on the day they told my daughter that Lilly had Septo-optic dysplasia (SOD) and among others things, she was blind. I was absolutely amazed that Brittany held it together and went straight to, 'what do we do to help her.' She is such a strong and amazing mother. She always provides only the best for Lilly. She works with her everyday to help her stay developmentally even with her peers. Lilly will be turning a year old in less than 30 days. We have been on a very long and winding journey with Lilly. Multiple hospital visits, numerous doctors visits, hundreds of shots and heal sticks and blood tests, meetings with hospital higher ups to demand proper medical care for Lilly. She is truly the most blessed thing that has ever happened to me and my family.

Lilly babysitting baby Daniel

I worry all the time about how Lilly will be as she grows up. How will she do in school, how will she get along with other children, how will they treat her, how will she get around, what will she do when she is older. I have a million more questions. How will her teachers treat her, what if she is bullied, will she get a seeing eye dog or a cane or both, will she ever see her mothers beautiful face and know she looks just like her mother when she was little.  Once Brittany gets married I fear I will see them less and less as time goes by. Life happens and things get busy and visits slow down. I just hate missing things that she does. She is a ham...all the time! She dances and 'strikes a pose'. She is not imitating anyone, because she can't see them, but she make a pose with a flair!! She is so gentle with her fingers feeling your face or holding on to you, she is happy...all the time. She is getting her own little personality and is  enjoying joking around with you. She is a sneaky little thing. She will hold both of your hands (so they are occupied) and use her foot to feel around for things that she is not supposed to have--cell phones, iPads, glasses etc. Then she uses her foot to bring them close to her.

Ok I'll stop going on and on about Lilly.

Onto another topic...SNOW! I want it!! a lot of it!! I don't know if we are going to get it, but I NEED a snow day. Not just so I can be off work but I need to be relaxed and soothed. Watching the snow fall is very soothing and enjoyable to me. I need a day to just unwind! I have so many things going on and so many things due for work and school that I am beginning to get stressed...A LOT!!! I am not really a drinker but I have considered starting. Maybe I could get lost in a bottle of tequila! No instead I get lost in a large portion of food! Why can't I be one of those people that lose weight like crazy when they are stressed...noooo I have to be one that eats everything in site and gains a 1000 pounds!! Speaking of eating...I started my new meal plan today. It was very tasty. Egg salad and veggie soup. I am still taking my lunch from home every day. Much better and cheaper than school lunches. I have a wedding to go to in August so there needs to be less of me soon.

It's past my bedtime so I'm signing off!
Good night Lillybug, MiMi loves you with every fat inch of her body!!

KK